Friday, 18 October 2019


'You're barkin' useless ref' was, I'm fairly certain, the shout I heard on several occasions last Saturday afternoon.

On a day so grim it reminded me of the old 'what's grey and smells of curry' joke, we headed off to the London Borough of Barking and Dagenham in reasonable spirit. The area has a bit of a brexity feel to it with the litter strewn streets seemingly home to large numbers of London cabbies. Mayesbrook Park  itself is rather nice, even in the rain, and is worth the short rain ride out for a picnic or whatever takes your fancy.

At one end of the park, nestled behind an impressive looking leisure facility you find the home of Barking FC. In saying it is one of the very few places to make Raynes Park Vale's place look like Wembley Stadium I'm being kind but at least they know how to deal with disreputable 70's celebrities.

The home team had a plan which they executed well and we struggled to get into gear for much of the match. That said we did leave with a bitter taste due to a couple of black clad villains. You will have seen various videos of the second half goal that wasn't, after which the lino made it clear he didn't understand the bit about a ball being played backwards. In the first half standing behind the goal at the posh end of the ground we were convinced we should have had a penalty. The referee was poorly positioned, bearing mind the linesman was over on the side the corner was taken from. Make your own mind up:

All disappointment was soon forgotten after the game when we we treated to some of the latest continental fashion tips from Carlos Canha. 

Enough of the past, back to the seaside tomorrow and Herne Bay which, if you've never been before, is always a good day out.

Kick off is at 2 but get down early and enjoy the seafront, it might not even be raining.


(It's John Major btw).

Friday, 11 October 2019

Catch up

Time for a long overdue catch up and, although the bar was set on the low side, what times we've been having.

September started in glorious fashion with a trip to Ramsgate and the sort of day you never want to end. The weather was that good you'd have been forgiven for thinking we were up the road from Malaga never mind Margate. On getting to the ground a little later it became clear, from looking at the pitch,  that the sun had been shining non-stop for months.

Despite the dubious surface the game was a scorcher and, as far as I know for the first time, I even managed to film a couple of goals. First up Rocco....

Then Tobin, F with superbly timed effing encouragement from every dog's favourite Nutty snack.

Next up Haywards Heath, where the approach to the ground makes you think you're about to enter one of non league football's great arenas. Reality dawns as soon as you're through the turnstile however so for a change I can get away with just one photo of the ground. The other three sides are 98% nothing.

I think we played OK and were good value for the draw, lovely touch by Fazackerley for the goal. There was the usual array of dodgy decisions (all against us of course!) but for once the officials could be excused as the floodlights were not the brightest. Either that or the home side's commercial team (a certain Mr Dewsnip) hadn't yet earned enough to properly feed the meter). So 1 goal each, a few flailing handbags at the end and to top it all a new friendship was forged (althouygh the one on the left looks understandably nervous).

Missed Sittingbourne as I was on my way to the beach but the pilot interrupted my G&T to tell me that Seb Skillen had once again stepped up and delivered on behalf of the glabrous among us.

Tomorrow we're to Barking. Be aware that there are no District or Hammersmith & City Line trains out of central London. Central Line is running but you'll be relying on Colin staying awake and remembering to open the doors. Good luck with that. The other thing to note is that the area near the ground appears to be almost as dry as Ramsgate's pitch so you might want to take refreshment in the City beforehand.


A sausage, a wrap and a mild mannered janitor.

With the trials and tribulations of last season fast receding and o the back of three impressive displays, unbeaten against teams expected ...